About CHURCH BIZ

LOGLINE

A white church and a black church accidentally merge…and all Hell breaks loose as they confront their biases on faith, sexuality, race and everything else about life as it escalates to apocalyptic proportions.

ABOUT THE SHOW

An episodic digital comedy about two incredibly different ethnic churches that must find meaning in their modern world, together, as life seems to crumble around them. Set in an extreme, fast-talking, heightened world of a religious workplace, Church Biz starts when two congregations suddenly, accidentally and spontaneously merge together. This unplanned event happens on the day in which Pastor Gerald (the oldest, grouchiest , white man ever) was set to retire and pass the torch on to his organist son-in-law, Daniel. Everyone knows Pastor Gerald despises Daniel because he can’t seem to knock up his daughter, Deborah causing them to adopt three Asian children. But no one expected Pastor Gerald to turn over the reigns of his church to African American royalty: Reverend Joe Jackson and his wife, First Lady Janine, during their combined celebration.The Jacksons are the leaders of the Third Neighborhood Church down the street. But when Pastor Gerald seemed to be having a heart attack during his last sermon which seemed to be caused by a mysterious Latina woman, the deed was done.. Hilarious episodes ensue where church members  experience a clash of  cultures, theology and sexual tension. Each episode takes place in the church building and surrounding sacred spaces. You’ll meet characters like  overzealous big haired church lady Dolly who always confuses Jesús the custodian for the real Jesus of Nazareth, Norma, Pastor Gerald’s wife who always talks in a transatlantic accent, like she’s in film from the 1960’s, Renee the snarky, millennial assistant who runs on adderall and espresso to cope with her oppressive patriarchal workplace—there is always a reason to ask God to deliver us from evil. Cue Herman Herman, the assistant to the Bishop who has been assigned to investigate and rectify the whole situation on behalf of their denomination: Western Trinitatarian Fellowship. That’s right: WTF.

WORLD + TONE

A workplace comedy where theological institutions are just as powerful and influential as politics within society. Church Biz pulls the curtain back and spills the tea about life in church offices, holy cubicles, worship choirs and reveals the dirt on the real housewives of your less than favorite ministers.You haven’t truly been baptized unless your pastor almost drowns you. You better brush up on your Bible and do the sign of the cross. Don’t know how? Just fake it. Everyone does. You’ll be fine. Or..you might go to Hell. Who knows. Pray for your salvation and hope for the best. Blessings.

SERIES SYNOPSIS (text in progress)

SEASON 1

Pastor Gerald is set to retire, but he is reluctant to pass the baton to his overeager son in law, Daniel. Instead on his last day he has a heart attack inspired by a mysterious Latina woman who enters his sanctuary. On his last breath Pastor Gerald names Reverend Joe Jackson as his successor.

CHARACTERS (descriptions coming soon)

Pastor Gerald Smith

Norma Smith

Deborah Lindquist

Daniel Lindquist

Lindquist Children: Jonah (15) Isaiah (16), Esther (1)

Renee Seven

Reverend Joe Jackson

1st Lady Janine Jackson

Jackson Children: Tanisha (18), Mellie (16) Joe Jr. (10).

Veronica

Mr. Herman Herman

Dolly

Margie

Señorita Lupita Peròn

EPISODE GUIDE

S1E1: Pastor Gerald is passing the baton of Shining Light Church. He was supposed to be to appointing his replacement but instead he announces a church merger, to the surprise of everyone. Daniel, assistant pastor, was hoping for the lead pastor job but Pastor Gerald instead announces a merger with Reverend Joe Jackson and his First Lady Janine, from the Black 3rd Neighborhood Church down the street. A mysterious  woman appears and flusters Pastor Gerald..and then he...dies?!

S1E2 Mr. Herman Herman, a British delegate from the denomination, arrives to announce the plans for  church acquisition, and he brings a documentary filmmaker. . Little did he know that he would show up to the apocalypse. Church people are fleeing for their lives as the Jacksons steal the spotlight and try to get the situation under control. We discover assistant pastor Daniel is married to Debra and father of their three kids and Pastor Gerald is resurrected. He’s not in Heaven or hell.  Bummer.

S1E3 Pastor Gerald is not happy he was resurrected. Mr. Herman tries to clean up the mess and figure out why in the world Pastor Gerald announced a merger when there was an investigation and an looming acquisition. Oops. Time for Herman to sort things out. 

S1E4 The next day Sunday’s church meeting, Herman Herman  decides to get intel from each clergy and congregant, interviewing them one by one.  He  takes all sorts of questions and suggestions from random/crazy congregants learning all the outlandish theologies that exist. Herman holds a  town hall meeting and the mysterious Latin woman reappears.

S1E5 Reverend Jackson and his wife Janine now  lead the church, under Herman’s supervision, but it may be the death of him (literally).  The 3rd Neighborhood Church choir sings hellfire and brimstone, with a smile. The mysterious, Latin  woman turns out to be pastor Gerald’s masseuse, Lupita. Seniorita Lupita says she’s been “intimate” with Pastor Gerald. Yikes.

S1E6

S1E7

S1E8

S1E9

S1E10

ABOUT THE CREATOR

Tony Gapastione is a progressive pastor turned filmmaker. When Tony is not shepherding his congregation with his ridiculous and far from perfect life, he consults with other communities of faith, shares stories and teachings via podcast, and invests in makers of all kinds. Passionate about telling stories that incite awareness about rarely discussed theological issues like white supremacy (how fun right?), gender and sexuality, topics rarely discussed from Sunday pulpits. Tony founded a media nonprofit called BraveMaker focused on social justice, diversity and inclusion. Through film screenings, community dialogues and an annual film festival, BraveMaker affects cultural change through art and conversation. Tony and his wife, Wendy, live in Redwood City, CA and have three daughters, ages 9, 11, and 13.

Contact: tony@bravemaker.com | 650-701-7661.